13/06/2013

I want a life that's not here
a life far away from waking up
             "alright"
a life with
               kisses
               and dirty dishes
               and wrinkled sheets
     that are
                             yours and mine
     and
                             mine and yours.

03/06/2013

I love you.
I love who I am when you're around, and how you make me feel about myself. You enable me to push aside my imperfections, and insecurities, and open up to the world and relax. Nobody else has ever made me feel that way, but you.

25/05/2013

I cannot wait for the day that I can turn and look at you, with a huge smile on my face, and say "I'm his girl."

22/05/2013

“I could start fires with what I feel for you.”

—	Fires, David Ramirez

21/05/2013

I woke up.

I woke up, from dreaming of you.

I woke up, hoping to see your face.

I woke up, wanting to be in your arms.

I woke up, wishing to kiss you.

I woke up, and I was alone.

20/05/2013

“I decided on you, don’t you get that? I decided on you. I don’t want to go fucking other people and then walk around feeling thrilled and then sad, or empty, or whatever. I like the smell of your hair, and I like the sound of your voice, and I fucking decided on you.”

18/05/2013

"Fall in love with someone who promises to make you laugh, fall in love with the constant feeling of being anchored to someone who makes the crash of waves bearable,  someone who makes you stronger. Fall in love with someone who tells you that if they fall asleep waiting for you to call, they'll call you in the morning. - but not too early. Be in love with something greater than the both of you that defies your superstitions. Be in the arms of someone you can call your lover, someone that completes your heart. Be with someone who lets you be wrong and wades in the mistake with you. Fall in love and write down in your diaries "we made it through," knowing there is more (good things) to come. But most of all, hold on to that love with clenched fists and a willing heart."

05/05/2013

Commitment.
It scares me. More than scares me, in fact. It petrifies me. I'm scared to open myself to someone like that again. I'm scared that I will get hurt. Again. But when it comes to you, I will be able to crush that fear. I will be able to let you in, past my walls, and into the recesses of my heart.

29/04/2013

I have a strong imagination. But there are some things I can't imagine...
I can't imagine anyone having a crush on me.
I can't imagine myself being anyone's last thought before they drift off to sleep.
I can't imagine anybody getting butterflies just because they saw me, or because I said hey and smiled at them.
I can't imagine anybody smiling at their phone or computer screen just because they got a message from me.
Why would anybody even do that?
I'm just me. Nothing extraordinary, nothing special. Just me.
Why did you do that?
Why did you pick me?

26/04/2013

My heart is scarred and damaged. I have been far too reckless with it the past, and that eventually made me too closed off. I don't think I can open up again. I don't think that I can get to a place where I can feel like I can let anyone break through the walls that I put up. You will prove me wrong. You will heal my heart. My scars will fade with every second I spend by your side.

23/04/2013

The first time you kissed my lips, I felt my bones tremble. I felt my heart melt, slowly unfreezing. The more you kissed me, the more I melted. I'm not frozen any more. Thank you.

19/04/2013

I have a lot of imperfections, I suppose we all do.
But I'm sorry for my imperfections, because they can cause great pain to others at times.
I'm sorry that I'm self destructive and that I often want to hurt myself.
I'm sorry that I sometimes want to give up on everything and let myself go.
I'm sorry that sometimes I try to run from issues.
I'm sorry I sometimes want to die.
I'm sorry that I sometimes hide my emotions from you, or avoid talking about how I'm feeling.
I'm sorry if I push you away when you're trying to be there for me.

Know that, even when I do these things, I still love you, I still need you.
I take a lot of patience and time. I'm sorry.

13/04/2013

You.

I've spent hours contemplating

the words to say to you

but no combination

of twenty six different letters

could ever accurately capture

even a sliver of what this feeling is.

 

09/04/2013

I'm in.
If you're in, I'm in.

06/04/2013

Don't let yourself not feel. You're worth so much more than walking around numb. I promise, from the bottom of my heart, you are.